the ocean

Before 2021 the ocean seemed very far away to me.

Although it’s only just over an hour’s drive from home, my family and I rarely made our way down to it. The days and nights spent by the crashing waves of Charlestown beach were mostly during our one week of summer camping every year. We would spend all day in our hot campsite at Burlingame, just counting down the minutes until it was time to gather our towels and put on our swimsuits.

It was a salty, sandy, windswept occasion, and oh, how we’d soak up those evenings. Driving back to the campground in our damp suits, and rinsing off in the steaming-hot, coin-fed shower stall before we went to sit around a campfire…it’s a warm fuzzy memory that will forever be sitting comfortably in the back of my mind.

2004, click on the photos to enlarge them

Then, we grew up (unfortunate, I know), and the annual camping trips slowed…then stopped completely. And the salty air seemed farther away than ever.

Making day-trips down to the coast just seemed like too much of an effort to be worth it, and for a few years, I didn’t see the ocean at all.

Charlestown beach, January 1st, 2021

Fast forward to January 1st, 2021, when my older sister Taylor declared that she was going to the beach. Mom and Riley Mae decided to tag along, and after a very tumultuous start to the day (and a small breakdown at the lunch table — because what better way to ring in the new year?), I climbed into the passenger seat of Taylor’s little blue Subaru.

And that was the start of it all.

That was the day that Taylor made the resolution to go on 52 outdoor adventures in one year, and that was the day that Mom, Riley, and I were crazy enough to adopt the resolution ourselves. That was the day that The Happiness Squad™ was born, and that was the day that our relationship with the mighty Atlantic ocean changed.

Riley Mae’s 23rd birthday at the beach — April 8th, 2023

I’m not sure that I’ve ever laughed or cried as hard as I did during that year of adventures, and it all started with walking the beach in the middle of winter. Which, of course, could’ve been a nightmare. But no, we were blessed with a windless, mild, overcast day. And we were greeted with soft, moody waves and pastel skies. It was heaven, and we only left hours later, when we were completely chilled to the bones.

In our year of adventures, we visited the ocean 12 separate times — usually going prepared with arms full of blankets (don’t ask how many times my sisters and I took naps on the beach), and eyes peeled for heart-shaped stones.

And it never got old.

February 14th, 2021 — May 6th, 2021

We saw the ocean with snow on the sand, and with turquoise waters in the spring. We saw it with dark angry waves, and with waves as clear as glass. Bitter winds, blistering summer heat, and muggy evenings. We saw it hidden under a magical layer of fog, with loons diving in and out of the waves, and ospreys hunting in the air above them. We saw it under a full pink moon, and smiling crescents.

February 26th, 2021

Aside from a couple warm summer days, we mostly chose to visit at times when we knew the beach would be fairly empty and quiet. Days where we could sit out on the jetty for hours, either in silence, or while having long talks about obscure subjects. I can assure you that some of the conversations that the ever-present seagulls overheard would certainly not be suitable for anyone else’s ears.

Sometimes we would just make up stories and indulge in daydreams about how someday we’ll buy a beach house together and live out our dream of seeing the ocean every day (we thought our dream might be coming true for a hot second when I briefly dated a rich boy who lived in a beach house just a couple miles from our dear ocean…but, spoiler alert: we are still beach houseless).

December 31st, 2021

The more we visited the sea, the more we discovered that it just…fixed things. Physically, mentally, emotionally. Sitting in the sand could renew our hope, listening to the crashing waves could restore our peace, watching the little sandpipers run back and forth could turn depression into something that almost felt like joy.

And by December 31st, 2021, when we visited the ocean for the last time that year, it was our best friend, and our safe place. We had this trust that when we were feeling tired, or overwhelmed, or were despairing over some personal problem, that the ocean would give us answers. Or, at the very least, bring us back to us. And it did, just about every time.

It must just be something in the salty air.

August 17th, 2021

Ever since then, we’ve made sure to visit the ocean many times, because the clarity of thought that we get there is just something that we need more of in our lives.

And so now, two years later, when one of us is feeling like we just want to run away, or forget everything in our lives for even just a day, you’ll hear us say: I just wish I was at the ocean right now.

Like it’s some kind of cure-all.

August 2nd, 2022

And maybe it’s just a temporary peaceful escape from everyday life (and the stress that comes with it), but maybe the ever-changing sea is just what the soul needs sometimes.

Either way, I’ll admit that I definitely wouldn’t mind sitting by the sea right now.